Based on the overall theme: the inside of a ping pong ball must feature.


Hi, I’m Kelly. I’m not sure why I’m called that. bingo_womenMaybe it’s because I was first in the queue for names or something? Great, I thought, I’m gonna be the one that gets the ball rolling. As it happened it wasn’t to be, it was always a double digit that that happened to, not me. Don’t get me wrong, I did a lot of bouncing about in my time, a lot of reaching the top… Huhnnn! Only to lose the energy and plummet down to the bottom again argh! – Well, most of the time. I was in a constant state of flux if you know what I mean. There again, you couldn’t imagine that, could you? After all, some readers can’t imagine fuck all. Sometimes I’d be like “here we go again the old fogies are at it.” Or I’d be like, “why is it Snakes n Ladders again, today IS Wednesday, isn’t it? It was the pissy knicker smell that used to get to me, I don’t know why – I mean I didn’t even have a nose for Christ sakes. But I could see them… through the opaque skin that enveloped me – that sort of ghostly blur when you’re a yolk suspended in albumen, (I only know that ‘cos one of my distant cousins was gonna end up like a baby chick). My only claim to fame was this one time when I won somebody a Strawberry Jelly and a tin of Garden Peas. Yes, I could see them, all lined up in their Shackleton’s with their cups of tea and ginger biscuits waiting eagerly to pounce with their magic markers. My goal in life was to end up in the possession of Ying Han and go to Rio, but I’ll have to be thankful with the ‘Be Lively in Your Nineties’ night at the Bognor Regis Care Home for Veterans. Oh, hang on a minute action, at last, here we go…Huhnnn! Yay!! “Ladeee’s and Gennelmen last number for a tube of Steradent… Kelly’s eye The Number one…don’t move your markers…check, please.



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